Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize