Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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