Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
