Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
