There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
