It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
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If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
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Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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