There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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