the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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