You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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