There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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