I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
