At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
