Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
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I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
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You sprinted into the side of a parked car
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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