he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
