new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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