I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
MIDGETS
????
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize