Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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