u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
