This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
