Sponge bath it is.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
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