i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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