I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
it hurts more in the daytime
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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