I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
