i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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