Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
