So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
