And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep