I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I am naked and annoyed.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
