i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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