please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
