I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
