There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize