I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
