I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
My balls are so social today.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Randomize
