But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
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