Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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