Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
