So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I wish there were birth control emojis
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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