i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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