There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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