I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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