at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
