it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You left your underwear on the fireplace
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
