Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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