Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
