The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
