ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
