if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
My dick has a subreddit
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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