Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize