you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?